(Other People’s Planned Parenthood, that is)

Yeah, you know me! You know who else is down with the P.P.? Gwenyth Paltrow and Blythe Danner. I just checked my Gmail and saw an incoming message from Gwenyth Paltrow & I about shit my pants. I was all, “OMG, she’s gotten wind of how much I diss her ass in Snap Judgments on Jezebel! She can hear me sniggering all the way in Hollywood when Michael K from DListed delivers yet another WWE-in-magnatude bloggerly smackdown on the G. P.! Oh noes!!” 

But for serious? This has me questioning my previously unwavering celeb sartorial hatred of Gwenyth “Fishsticks” Paltrow:

Dear (*Deleted*),

“We are Planned Parenthood” — Blythe Danner and her daughter, Gwyneth Paltrow.Join us! Make a Mother’s Day gift in honor of someone you love.   

We are a mother and daughter. We are a grandmother(!) and a mother. We are actors. We are a family that believes everyone should have access to health care, sex education, and reproductive choice. We are Planned Parenthood. 

We are Blythe Danner and Gwyneth Paltrow, and this is the third time we’ve written a Mother’s Day letter to people like you who support Planned Parenthood and the people they serve. We think that Mother’s Day is the perfect time to think about what it means to support mothers in this country.

There is no organization that we know of that supports motherhood and all that it means more than Planned Parenthood. Will you join us today to make a Mother’s Day gift?

These are challenging times for Planned Parenthood and the people they serve. When we heard the news that at least one in four teenage girls has a sexually transmitted infection, we felt shock, anger, disbelief — and a renewed sense of responsibility to do our part to change this unbelievable statistic. We felt a renewed sense of responsibility to the millions of mothers and daughters, just like us, who are the victims of the backward policies and lack of education that led to this situation.

As Mother’s Day approaches, we are grateful for the opportunity to make a difference and hope you’ll join us.

The Planned Parenthood Mother’s Day campaign happens just once a year. It’s a special time for us, made even more special by helping mothers and daughters everywhere by donating to Planned Parenthood Federation of America.

If you like, in honor of Mother’s Day, you can make your gift in honor of someone you love. And we’ll send that special person a special card saying that you’ve chosen to make a gift to Planned Parenthood Federation of America in her or his name.

You’ll be making a gift to millions of mothers — and to the future of our country. What a profound way to mark this day.


Blythe Danner and Gwyneth Paltrow
on behalf of the Planned Parenthood Federation of America





   Uh, this is kind of awesome. As far as I’m concerned, G. P. can blab to the journos about her “fetish shoes” all she wants, so long as she continues to support such a worthwhile organization. It’s rare that a celeb’s philanthropic streak can move me from blind hatred to grudging acceptance, and this may be just the case. Here’s the other letter I got from PP today:


“Planned Parenthood  is celebrating National Women’s Health Week, May 11-17, by offering a series of events and services. We invite you to stop by our health center next week for a free Pap smear, birth control, emergency contraception or sexually transmitted infection testing.

Monday, May 12–National Women’s Check-Up Day
9 a.m. – 6 p.m.
Planned Parenthood Health Center, (address removed)

In recognition of National Women’s Check-Up Day, PPGMR will offer free family planning services, including annual exams and birth control.

Tuesday, May 13
9 a.m. – 6 p.m.
Planned Parenthood Health Center, (address removed)

PPGMR will provide free emergency contraception (EC). EC lowers the risk of pregnancy when taken within 120 hours of unprotected intercourse. PPGMR encourages sexually active women to have EC available in case of emergency.

Thursday, May 14
9 a.m. – 6 p.m.
Planned Parenthood Health Center, (address removed)

Planned Parenthood is offering free sexually transmitted infection testing at its health center. Bring your partner and get tested together!

Friday, May 15
9 p.m. (address removed)

Let us demonstrate the proper use of dental dams at our new Dental Dam Kissing Booth! Planned Parenthood will provide education about different contraceptive methods in a fun environment. This event is hosted by the Memphis bar One More.

Make your health a priority during National Women’s Health Week!”


   Useful info, non? The Dental Dam Kissing Booth sounds pretty sweet. Dirty, possibly messy, but sweet. I may go get me a free pap. Nothing draws me in & endears me quite like free shit. Except that nothing is really free, and I’ve paid for that pap with my donations to Planned Parenthood, I’m sure.

Please catalogue your favorite passages of Our Bodies, Ourselves in the comments.