Apparently someone in Washington, DC, is looking for a writer/security guard. This is one of the funniest and weirdest job postings I’ve seen in a long time. So nice of them to pay for the uniform!

But what I wonder is this:  What if someone sneaks past you while you’re preoccupied with coming up with a breezy lead or opening paragraph? What if someone comes up behind you and grabs the receptionist’s Mac while you’re agonizing over the perfect kicker? While apprehending an intruder, could you ask for advice on sentence structure? Or how he feels about semi-colons? Or inquire as to whether he knows a better, punchier word for “intruding?”