Sorry for the slump in Beauty posts, but with the economy limping along like a 3-legged dog (only not as cute), it’s hard to think about frivolous things to blow money on. Um, besides my wedding, that is! Anyway, for inspiration, I like to turn to the Request Line, AKA- you hoors. Today, we have a tandem call concerning two disparate entities- both alike in aesthetic requirement- but like the doomed lovers Pyramus and Thisbe, there are only a few inches keeping one and the other apart. And with good reason! For, I am referencing the precious follicular real-estate, the ocular window treatments we know as the eyebrows and eyelashes.

Our lovely lamb Oversidi is having some trouble with her Brooke Shields impression, and dear, sweet Katastic is losing lashes like the Golf Channel is losing ratings with Tiger Woods benching it for the rest of the season. Now, considering that the brows and lashes are the only other patches of hair a woman is allowed to have (of course, I’m being sarcastic. I don’t wax my pubes, cuz fuck that), besides the locks on the top of the head, this is serious business! So, I’m going to have to break this up into two bits. The first of which concerns the gables framing the face (after the jump).

“Eyebrows: Thin and separate. There should be two!”

There is nothing that I find more glamorous than a well-groomed brow. I find that when the brows are nice and thick, tamed and groomed and filled-in to perfection- you can get away with wearing way less makeup, b/c they frame the face and lend a dramatic, sophisticated look. Love ’em! Anyway, Oversidi writes:

“As I age, my brows are paler, more sparse, and really add nothing to my face at all. I see so many brow makeovers in magazines and beauty books– and the changes in the brows make an incredible difference in how someone looks. (It is true that in the before brow photo, they were wearing no other make up at all, and in the new brow photo, they are all glammed up?)

Are these incredible transformations possible, or do they only work in photos or perhaps onstage?
How can i get a fuller, natural more youthful looking brow, that suits my face? And hopefully, using a technique that does not take too much time.”
Well, most people’s brows do thin with age, and I think restoring them to near-Oasis proportions can strip years off someone’s look. As for what’s going on behind-the-scenes in the magazine makeover photoshoots? Likely the model in the ‘before’ photo is actually not wearing any makeup. At least not any on her brows, anyway. See, models really do look pretty normal without makeup on, and most of them to have lighter brows before all the primping. Why? Because models take good care of their skin. They use sunscreen and some of them get facials and whatnot. A lot of products labeled “brightening” or ones that claim to “even out skin tone” contain mild skin-bleaching agents. That’s how they even out the skin, after all- by lightening hyper-pigmentation and reducing the look of acne scars and such. I’ve used brighteners before, and not only did they make my brows lighter, but they also bleached the two lovely beauty marks on my face into near-oblivion.
For example, peep this photo of Eva Longoria bare-faced as compared to the Littlest Diva in her full-on drag queen regalia:
Homegirl’s brows are bleached to hell, and she basically draws them suckers back on every day. Which is fine, b/c it’s not that hard to do. But, before we get into the tutorials, we have to figure out how to give you more to work with in the thin brows department.
Is it possible to re-grow brows? You know, I’m not really sure. There is conflicting evidence out there. I mean, I guess Rogaine works on some people’s heads, but there are those who believe that it doesn’t work at all. But you know you really shouldn’t try putting Rogaine on your facial hairs, as the ways in which it could all go horribly wrong are too plentiful to enumerate. Then there’s the time-honored tricks of stimulating hair growth used by hippies the world over: conditioning, strengthening, follicular massage, and excavating the necessary pores. Basically, as colloquial wisdom would have it: if you use toner on your brows, massage the area while cleaning, and apply a strengthening brow conditioner, fuller brows can be yours.
This may or may not be true. I can see it working on younger people- I too, lived in the 90s and plucked my brows to hairline fractural proportions in the name of Stafani. And it was hard to recover, but with patience I eventually grew them back and stopped looking so damn surprised. But yeah, easier to recover at 17 than 47. Still, it’s worth a shot to try it.
Anastasia is a Hollywood brow expert and purveyor of fine brow-ly goods. This company makes a brow conditioner that claims to strengthen to re-grow brows.
Reviews of Nu-Brow are extremely mixed, so accept that you’re gambling with your money. I would try this product out for you, but if my brows get any bigger, they’ll start casting me in Geico commercials. So, I’m not the ideal guinea pig. But, the ingredients- soy protein among them- look promising. Peep Anastasia’s website for the full run-down.
As for filling them in your own damn self, this option is cheaper, easier, and faster than trying to grow back your old glory. First: Pluck all the gangly, stray hairs, and trim the unruly creepy long hairs.
These Japanese brow razors are really good for easy trimming- brush the hairs straight up and trim the ends, brush back down into place. Done.
Then, you can do this next part one of four ways: a.) you can fill in the brows first with an angle brush and brow powder (just use the really thin brush to draw brow hairs back in, essentially. Start from the bottom, where the root would be, and flick upwards in the direction your brows grow. Easy peasy. Just follow the growth and you’ll be fine!) and then set with a clear or colored brow gel or wax.
OR, b.) if your brows are really light in color, use the angle brush to coat the light hairs in powder to help them stand out. Use the same method for applying brow powder above. Then, you can set this with the gel or wax.
OR c.) if your brows are so wispy and barely there, you can use a pencil first and oh-so-lightly fill the brows in before dusting with brow powder. The gel is really optional here.
Lastly, d.) if your in a damn hurry (like I always am), you can use a brow gel tinted to the color of your brows or slightly darker to quickly coat the brows like you’d use a mascara. This will help define them, and perhaps lend a thicker looks as well.
The best, cheapest brow grooming kit is Sonia Kashuk for Target.
You could also splurge on Anastasia’s brand at Sephora.
There are lots of brow gels available from lots of cosmetics companies like Benefit and such. Your best bet for a variety of formulas and shades is to go to Sephora and play around.

Hope this helps! You cna share your overplucking horror stories in the comments!!