In an attempt to read news that doesn’t spell catastrophe for my rights, finances or future way of life in general, I took a little spin around the web today.  If you are feeling immensely pissed due to the fucktards in D.C. like I am, then anything that DOESN’T have to do with the current crises would be welcome.

A little levity:

Tom Wopat, aka ‘Luke Duke’ was busted at Mitchell International Airport in Milwaukee with some delicious weed on his person.  Having flown through that airport countless times, all I can say is that clearly Tom knows nothing of pusseh weed.


In Ohio a woman was arrested for “chasing children, urinating on a porch, and blocking traffic – all while wearing a cow suit.”  The best part is that she showed up for her court date, still dressed in her udderly fab ensemble.


Las Vegas PD will begin identifying illegal immigrants who have been arrested and brought into the detention center, and initiating deportation proceedings against them.  Whatever, just don’t let OJ get away again, m’kay?


Brewer fans are so excited about ending the teams’ 26 year playoff drought that they can’t stay away from Miller Park.  Some were “aided by cocktails” and some just wanted the midnight sausages.


Texas Gov. Rick Perry thinks the national economy “is a drag“.  Hey Mofo, take it up with your boy, Dubya.  Meanwhile, Dallas Cowboys receiver Terrell Owens is whining, again.


Janet Jackson has canceled another show on her Rock Witchu Tour and has been taken to a hospital in Montreal.  Yo, Janet – If we have to go to shitty jobs that no-one cares about then so do you.