Heyyyyy guys, you know that last post I wrote about food? Yeah. I feel so bad, b/c I did not mean for that post to stir up such a reaction. I wrote it when I was really stressed and tired, so my barely-there eloquence was right out the window. I meant for that post to be about how dudes are ignorant. It was also supposed to be about normal, healthy-esque dieting and/or ways of eating (not making a habit of dessert is not dieting, it’s just a healthful thing to do if you don’t want diabeetus), not about disordered eating, even though many of you pointed out that it’s near impossible for the ideology of femininity and the reality of like, biology, to coexist without creating huge clashes. And clashes there are. Hoo boy. It looks like we all have a fucked up relationship with food, and I should have thought a little bit more about how to be sensitive to that fact before I cobbled together that stupid post. However, it got many of us talking, and that is a good thing, even if the topic is a little bit unhappy. SO, I’d like to make up for that post by opening up a dialogue about how food and “dieting” can sometimes have a positive affect on our lives and our bodies. My two picks for the upside of downsizing, after the jump!
Part of the point of the previous post was to point out the inherent differences in the way men and women view food. Yes, women are made to view food as “the enemy”, while guys are all “Mmmmmmm. Homer loves donut.” But you know what? In some ways we ladies are better off then dudes are in this game. To me, that women don’t typically eat chicken wings and pizza with abandon is actually a healthier way to view food. Some of the prevailing dieting wisdom is actually pretty decent advice. They’ll tell you to remember how you ate and were fed when you were a kid, and that that is usually a place to get back to. I don’t know about you guys, but pizza, chicken wings, cake, cookies, ice cream, and the like were special occasion foods. We only got to eat like that on holidays and birthdays, but the rest of the time it was mom’s 9 bean soup and other healthy home cookin’. Currently I’m trying to get back to that standard in my life, not just because it’ll result in being maybe a little smaller and healthier, but because I kind of miss the specialness of such things. Like, when I became an adult it was all “woo woo, ice cream for dinner!” but now that I’ve settled in to this pattern of eating anything I damn well please whenever the hell I want to, holidays and special occasions have kind of become less-than. It’s hard enough when you’re no longer a kid and Halloween sucks because you can’t trick-or-treat, and Christmas sucks because you can no longer picture Santa and Rudolph chillin’ on your roof while you drift off to sleep on Christmas eve. Add in the fact that the holiday TV programs you waited for all year are now sitting in your DVD collection and the “special” foods you only got to have a few times a year are available to you pretty much all the time, and the holidays are pretty much sapped of all their magic. I hear tell that you get the magic back when you have kids and get to tell them the Santa thing and buy them Halloween costumes and such, but I don’t plan on having any myself. Hell, I’m still just a big kid, and I want my holiday fever back!! I think being a woman, and having a history of that stupid control of food thing will make it easier for me to relegate certain things to special occasions only, while my Mr has never heard of “cutting back”, so I’ll just let him hoover down candy corn all year round. More instant gratification for him, sure, but he’ll never understand the unbridled excitement I’ll have when I see the first Bouche de Noel of the season on the bakery shelf.
Also, I think it’s a positive thing that women aren’t like guys in that they eat whatever and don’t think about any of the consequences. And I’m not just talking about aesthetic consequences. Most guys have this get-it-before-it-gets-me-and-when-it-gets-me-I’m-screwed attitude towards food. The gift of the male metabolism (or the gift of less beauty standards, or at least the gift of not really giving a fuck) is a double-edged sword because yes, they get whatever they want whenever they want it, but a lot of guys never learn to eat with their health in mind. My stepdad is totally this way. He hates veggies and still refueses anything the color green. He never learned to cater to this facet of his health, and now it’s too late for him. Right now he pretty much eats meat-and-potatoes and just takes really expensive cholesterol meds. Not an optimal way to deal.
On the flipside, many women (uh, my coworkers and girlfriends, at least) do seem to make choices that are healthier, or at least straddle the fence between health and weight-loss, as these paths do indeed run parallel to each other. Unforch, size IS usually the dominating factor in the equation, but that we eat turkey bacon and homemade vegetable whole-wheat pizzas instead of Domino’s is, believe it or not, a good thing in the long run. Not only is low-cal, low-fat, low-sodium eating better for our heart and lungs and waistlines and all that, but it also shows some creativity in problem-solving. I was overweight in high school, and one day I just got fed up. I didn’t want to starve myself, but I couldn’t keep on eating unhealthy food and hating the way I looked. In a way, “dieting” opened up a whole new world of food options for me, as I used to just be an all-junk-food eater. That I had to find ways to make food that was good for me while still being tasty was a challenge, but also exciting and fun. I know it’s a cliche’, but converting my favorite foods like nachos and pizza into recipes that would not send me down a fat-pants-shame-spiral made me feel like some sort of Creative Genius of the Kitchen, and so my cooking skill level was enhanced while my confidence was boosted in ways I didn’t know “dieting” could facilitate. You know, I don’t even consider the way I eat a “diet” anymore. I cook healthy, light-meat, veggie-centric dinners every night, take the leftovers as lunch, never drink sugary drinks, and don’t overdo the desserts or snacks. That’s all there is to it. My “diet” is just habit at this point, and one I can feel great about. Not only have I not gotten back up to those size 10 pants, but even better is the fact that I know my nutrition is solid. Diabetes, heart disease, and osteoporosis are more standard in my family than the Cajun Loudmouth Syndrome, and they strike my relatives down as early as age 35. But, you know, when fried chicken, butter, Coca-cola and Reece’s peanut butter cups are your four major food groups, it’s no big surprise. I’ve seen my family deal with poor health, I’ve seen the mass of bills and prescriptions, seen relatively young people struggle with lethargy, obesity, brittle bones and insulin shots, and I know that I am not going down that path. The annals of poor health are scarier to me than the number printed on the inside of a dress, thank you very much, and avoiding that never ending labyrinth of doctors and specialists is reason enough for me to believe that the moderated eating practiced by many women is made of WIN. “Forbidden Donut” indeed, Homer.
Any of you have happy/positive thoughts about food to share?
ButtercupPunch - "La clique, c’est chic!" 
February 2, 2009 at 11:53 am
maybe the thing I love most about food is having choices. and I don’t mean choices as in which is healthier for me (although that is certainly a plus), I mean choices as in flavor. I’m an adventurous eater and I like to try new things, and there is a whole world of foods out there to appease me.
February 2, 2009 at 12:35 pm
I eat whatever I want when I’m hungry for it. They say that you should eat like you did as a toddler. If you want something, eat it. If you don’t, don’t. Picking at things is okay. And if you would rather smear your food on your face and all up in your hair, do that as well.
February 2, 2009 at 12:38 pm
This strikes a chord with me because this is the first year of my life that I’ve actually managed to change my view of food to “hey, it’s good to eat this way and be healthy and feel good.” Before, I always converted any sort of attempt to eat healthy foods into a concern for aesthetics (i.e. thinness), and had to actively prevent myself from thinking about what I put in my body at all in order to avoid a big shame spiral of disordered eating. SO. Thanks to my boyfriend’s mama, who raised him with a good food attitude, and getting over the curse of my childhood pickiness, I’m currently having the time of my life experimenting with healthy, tasty things. I love making pizzas like the one you pictured.
As far as saving food for special occasions goes, I keep some cans of Cherry 7-Up in my fridge for when I’m having an extra shitty, horrible day. When this occurs, I drink that shit and everything is magically better thanks to the pink fizzy goodness. I’m not usually tempted to drink them on normal days because it makes me feel good when I see a bunch of them in the fridge and am reminded that my life has been going so well there’s been no occasion to drink one.
February 2, 2009 at 3:03 pm
You know, the truth is we eat more than we need.
I was just having this discussion last night. If I didn’t have a child at home, I don’t think I’d cook very often for myself. Actually, as it stands now, I cook him dinner every night but I don’t eat what I cook him.
Instead, I have smaller meals. A dinner for me is often a couple of apples with a hunk of cheddar. Some nights it’s just a bowl of cereal. Sometimes a sandwich.
I can see as an old lady perhaps roasting myself a chicken every couple of weeks or something, but there’s no way I’d cook a big meal for myself on a regular basis. As I get older, I am just not quite as hungry.
But rarely will I cook up a big meal for myself anymore.
February 2, 2009 at 3:36 pm
I make healthier choices when I am cooking for other people (which is rare, but I kind of enjoy). Then, I care more about balancing the plate with protein and veggies and what have you. Probably my worst food habit is my penchant for microwave meals (naturally loaded with sodium and preservatives, but a bit better if you buy them from the fridge aisle rather than frozen), due to my single living status. If I eventually live with someone or have kids, I know that my own eating will be healtheir because it’s more instinctual to me to “nourish” others and set a good example in company than it is when I’m just on my own. I think this actually extends into exercise as well.
That said, I’m way more grownup in my eating habits – yes, this was a realization that I am no longer 20 and can gorge on calories and booze with no visible repercussions anymore, but I think it’s very positive. I eat one to two servings of fruit a day now, make an effort to have breakfast, and save the deep-fried stuff for special occasions (okay a couple times a week – when you need jalapeno poppers, you need them), and it’s way better for me in the long run.
February 2, 2009 at 3:53 pm
I used to think I didn’t have problems with food, but it turned out I’m an emotional eater. Boo me.
I will never understand real disordered eating, I think, even though one of my sisters is bulimic. I eat what I want, when I want, and sometimes I need to decide to cut down a bit (like now, I’m creeping back into that place where my jeans have trouble fitting).
Usually I eat healthy stuff. I love stir fry, I even love just plain old boiled broccoli. It’s more the effort of cooking for myself night after night that’s the problem. I could use someone to share that “load” with, but unfortunately I don’t like my roommates enough to eat with them often.
I usually stay away from the deep-fried stuff too, unless I’m at a Jeze-meet-up, in which case I skip dinner and instead eat snacks I can’t even remember.
February 2, 2009 at 4:18 pm
@haguenite: Were there snacks? I only remember beer. Lovely, lovely beer.
February 2, 2009 at 4:22 pm
@tf: I remember putting something fishy in my mouth, and that’s nowhere as dirty as it sounds. I also remember you saying you had to leave in 30 minutes and then you stayed for another two hours or something. That was fun! And yes, the beer. And the shots. Also, me telling everyone they’re gorgeous.
Hm. I definitely need to come over again soon and I think the London Jezebels should go on a collective trip to the Netherlands.
February 2, 2009 at 6:18 pm
@mayor of bethville: that sounds good. i’m on your train.
February 2, 2009 at 8:00 pm
I think the important thing to remember is that there aren’t “bad” or “good” foods, and once we assign labels to the things we’re eating, we automatically set ourselves up to feel crappy or “bad” after eating them. It’s all about moderation and such. For me, I HAD to eat candy every day (tragic, I know) to stop associating it with being “bad” or, like you said, an “enemy.” And now I can have 50 pounds of it in the house like it ain’t no thang, whereas when I was starving myself, it was “eat one candy bar, eat 800.”
The weirdest part of it all, honestly, especially for a junk food fiend like me, is getting those cravings for healthy things. There are times when all I want in the world is fresh spinach with sea salt. Madness!
February 2, 2009 at 8:26 pm
The best advice ever! If you want to lose weight, stop eating processed food.
If you want to lose even more stop eating animal products, meat eggs and dairy!
Thanks for the well written article and cheers to you!
February 2, 2009 at 9:00 pm
I do not like it when my PB apologizes for her posts.
February 2, 2009 at 9:12 pm
I find my eating habits can cycle between “good” and “bad,” depending on what my other habits are at the time. When I’m training for a race and running a ton, I crave really nutritious things like fruits and veggies (and lots of carbs, of course). Then there are times when I’ll have a burger and fries like twice a week, and soda, nachos, pizza, etc… it’s generally because I’m stressed and feel like I need to treat myself.
February 2, 2009 at 10:02 pm
can we talk about what a pain in the ass it is to get healthy food, like produce?? it’s so pricey (why is local even more expensive?? wtf? i live in california, avocados should be free, not 89 cents each) that you want to buy it in bulk, but then you end up with rotten vegetables or moldy fruit! plus, the costco/grocery store is a huge ordeal, so we try to only go once a month for major stockpiling and then if you go full on hippie, and buy as you need it from your neighborhood store, you’re paying an arm and a leg for each item.
OK!
/end rant
February 2, 2009 at 11:00 pm
@m: current avocado price in manhattan: 1.99 each.
February 3, 2009 at 12:35 am
@ angiesyounglover : that’s what i mean, you’re subsidizing my avocado, mine should be free. OR! we’ll trade you for some pizza that doesn’t blow.