Every day I walk past this shopfront that I have mentally dubbed the Hideous Clothes for Society Women Store (HCSWS).  It occured to me a month or two ago to start taking pictures of the monstrosities cloaking the bedazzled mannequins, but only today did I finally stop, put my purse down on the street (firmly between my ankles –  this is London, after all) and actually snap a couple pics.  What I’m showing you today is actually the least aesthetically offensive window display I’ve witnessed in the last six months, as one of the dresses is, unusually, kind of cute (or might be, on a person shaped like a pillar). 

At any rate, this storefront is remarkable for the extremely tacky, and likely pricey, garments on show.  There was an entire month in which every dress in the shop was a solid background patterned by miniature hearts, and not ironically.  I have no problem with a heart pattern, but this wasn’t cute, it was straight-up unknowingly ugly.  The weird thing is that this store is in the middle of an extremely ritzy part of town, sandwiched on the same block at Vivienne Westwood, Donna Karan, and Issey Miyake.  I walk by these former shops, lust after the serious, constructed garments in the windows every morning, and then I hit the HCSWS headscratcher, as out of place as a crab on your 2,000 theadcount sheets. 

So while this isn’t the worst of the HCSWS sins, I thought it would be best to start off gently.  I’ll keep an eye (and how could I not?) on this store in the coming months and let you in on the worst window displays for mocking.  Again, please keep in mind that this is in the same area in which you’re expected to buy Cartier and Prada, and try to understand my befuddlement at the presence of this apparent thrift-shop tapestry.  The garment on exhibition in the middle, for example, appears in person to be fabricated from thin polyester and employ more wiring in its avant-garde hoopings than a college production of “Peter Pan.”  The dress on the left is all Vegas sequins:


It is impossible to emphasize enough to you how tacky, cheap, and itchy this looks in person – especially when viewed practically next door to Dior.  Finally, the most attractive garment I’ve ever seen in these windows EVER, for pencil-people:


I dig the color, and the cake trimming effect is cute!  I don’t personally know any woman who would look good in it since skinny-hipped high school, but I don’t hate it at all (note – dress not to be worn with matching purse, tank top, or shoes).  And that is another problem with this shop  – when they het a theme, they stick to it, come hell or high water.  Are they feeling turquoise?  Then EVERYTHING IS TURQUOISE.  Amazing, and surely more to come.