In December, Michelle Collins over at Best Week Ever turned up this amazing local advert for a perfume retailer ingeniously named the “Smells So Good Perfume Outlets.”

Quoth Michelle:

It was then that I discovered my Winter Jam of 2009. Never before had the epitome of luxury collided with the lowpoint of humanity in such a poetic and marvelous way. This youtube video, taped from directly off of someone’s TV, was the only online proof I could find of this work of art, and frankly its sh*tiness only heightens the dramatic effects of the commercial. It is the Andrew Cunanan of local ads.

Since I couldn’t possibly add anything more of value, I’ll leave her summation at that.  But it is also absolutely necessary to introduce those of you residing outside the UK to a (considerably slicker but no less beguiling) British contribution to the techno-commercial art world, that of We Buy Any Car (dot com).  Yes, you need sound:

The success of this commercial is due in equal parts to the painfully catchy jingle and the shameless mugging of the Huge Ackman-esque frontman, with whom I think I am in love.  He may be my own personal Svengali.   No matter where in the flat I am or what I am doing, when the Boy is watching television and this commercial comes on, I am drawn into the room like a moth to a bug zapper and stand, entranced and slack-jawed, for the duration of the ad spot.  Then, dazed, I will go about my business, seemingly fine…  until out of nowhere the next day, I’ll reflexively cry out “we buy any car!” and jerkily jackknife, my arms flailing.

They know what they’ve done.  Their website has the lyrics, should you be tormented enough to check it out (clearly, I was).  I thought that was outrageous enough… until I discovered the dance sequence tutorial.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be in front of my mirror.  Watch out, Beyonce.