It’s only a game-deciding goal in the World Cup.  A reasonable venue for the worst call of all freakin’ time.  There are about three American players being fouled, and yet the ref somehow managed to see something no one else in the entire stadium world could.  Amazing.



Kadinsky’s wonderful post the other day about how technology has drastically changed our lives reminded me of something weird.

We all know kids these days are a totally different beast than we were as kids — especially me, an Old. I can’t even imagine an adolescence with Facebook and cellphones — the trouble I would have found myself in would have been profound, life-altering and would surely have involved a prison sentence. My friend Sue and I were remembering recently how there was ONE PHONE is both of our houses, in the kitchen, and when we were teens, we’d have to conduct all our personal business in the middle of all the family activity. I actually remember climbing into my mother’s broom closet to plan a Friday night with the girls that involved going to the liquor store and swiping some of my older brother’s weed.

In any event, we all know kids have rediscovered vinyl, the Ramones, ’70s fashions, Audrey Hepburn movies. But did you know about the Old Spice?

You heard me. I said Old Spice. The cologne/aftershave my father used to wear, and would still be wearing if he was still alive — he’d be turning 82 soon. My son wears Old Spice deodorant, and my daughter wears it too. I just got back from a week in Nova Scotia getting her set up in her house at university, in fact, and I noticed all of her female roommates also use Old Spice.  So do most of their guy friends. The entire Dalhousie University campus reeks of old men, scotch and cigarettes, which, to me, is what Old Spice smells like.

But the kids! They LOVE Old Spice. My daughter says she’s pissed they don’t sell an Old Spice bathing gel and body moisturizer!

It is the most bizarre thing for me to give my son a hug goodbye in the morning and to be reminded of my dead father, I must say.

I welcome your thoughts. Can someone please explain the kids to me, and their love of Old Spice?


OK, as a continuation of the last post, my decision is this: I’m not changing my fucking name. Fuck it. However, the clincher was not the bureaucratic hassle, the fact that my professional history would be eclipsed by a person with a name that did not exist until October of this year, or the potential $1000 down the shitter. Nay, my doing this is a response to the sinister forces of my mother. (more…)

I hope y’all haven’t been slacking off at work too much and you have a nice clear spot on your desk — ‘cuz your head is gonna need a place to thunk in a minute.

I realize that mens magazines are not the best place to spend my time, but to be honest with you, if I’m going to be stuck reading a magazine then I’d rather it be a dude mag than some bullshit Cosmo that never fails to induce mega eye rolls of disdain (WHY MEN CHEAT IN AUGUST!! WHAT HE’S DYING FOR YOU TO DO IN BED!!) Come the fuck on already, there are not that many “sex secrets” in the whole universe, Cosmotards – write about something ORIGINAL. Oh, and HELPFUL. (more…)

Reason #17 to love Milwaukee: how can you not love a city that promotes a ‘fashion’ event like this? You stay klassy, Cream City, and remember to bark twice.

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